Editorial Friday 13 April 2012: The Nicholson Commissioning Board drinking game

Obviously, the live stream on www.commissioningboard.nhs.uk at 1 pm today of the next board meeeting of the Nicholson Commissioning Board is the most fun you can have with your clothes on and a fast broadband connection.

That goes without saying.

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Health Policy Insight cannot see a lily without the obsessive-compulsive disorder to gild it, however. To this end, here are the rules of a drinking game. Orange juice or absinthe at your own risk.

Reference to people watching the live stream - drink one finger

Attempt by board members to get New Zealand-born Chairman Mal to say "chips" (which he will pronounce "chups") -  drink two fingers

Reference to Communist imagery or metaphor by Coomrade Sir David - miss a turn

Use of the phrase "paradigm shift" with accomanying 'air fingers' - down drink in one

Reference to experimentation and learning from failure - three fingers

Use of the word 'liberating' - if un-ironic, three fingers. If ironic, down drink in one.

Sensible, bussinesslike atmosphere being rent asunder by a loud fart - four fingers

Reference to patients within first hour - refill glass to brim, down in one and repeat x 3

Use of phrase 'running before we can walk' - miss a turn.